My Divorce

So here’s the deal.  I am getting a divorce and there is nothing funny about it.  I have started writing every day, and although it starts off funny it quickly turns into sorry boring crap.

What have I been doing to deal with this crazy time in my life?  Trying to meet new people and hang out with old people (old as in people I already know, not necessarily old as in age) and basically keep my mind active.  I have had some pretty good times.  I’ve even come up with some new stances while playing Guitar Hero, but in the end there is still this huge gaping hole right in the center of my torso.  I know it will eventually go away, but it has really kept me from writing anything I want to post.  There’s other issues involved too.  Like, I don’t want to write anything that could cause hostility between me and my soon-to-be-ex-wife (soon to be referred to as my baby’s mama) not that she reads this, but someone she knows might and that might get ugly and ultimately I have no regrets about my relationship or bad feelings towards my spouse, and I don’t want to create any.

Anyway, another thing I’ve noticed doesn’t help at all is drinking.  I went wine tasting today, and to a brewery, and the jokes start rolling out and things seem great, and then somewhere in there is my overactive brain that brings the whole thing to a depressing stop.

Writing, which is why I am sitting here now, has to be about the loneliest thing you can do.  It’s just me and my thoughts, and for unknown reasons my mind likes to create the most horrific and painful ideas and memories in a rapid fire sort of fashion.  It’s like I sit here torturing myself.  I’m not fighting it anymore.  I figured I would write this to get it out there and off my chest and out of my mind.  Hopefully, it will help me think of new things to talk about that are a little more… happy.

People!  I love you people!  You and my friends have been amazing.  Everyone who patiently sits and listens while I rant and rave about my life, thank you for listening!  I can’t say how much I appreciate you guys and how much it helps.